The Lazy Sunday

movies_popcorn_soda

Now there are plenty of things to do on Sunday, its a very special day due to the headache most people have induced upon themselves the night before.

Bed shopping. I can’t think of a better way to kill the first waking hours on Sunday, then test driving a bunch of comfortable brand new beds. Make sure you go with a friend so you have someone for pillow talk.

One of the best reasons for going bed shopping is that most of the bed stores also contain message chairs. Just like the ones in the mall, except you don’t ave to put any money in them, just pretend that you want to buy something. You may luck out and get a hot sales lady…..More than likely you’ll get a chain smoking women in her 40’s that thinks she’s still got it going on.

Now, after you’re done enjoying king sized cat naps and full body messages for nothing, you need a way to spend your afternoon. In order to put my plan into action you will need to first raise $6.00. Do whatever you can to get the cash. I recommend looking in the couch cushions if you can’t find some change anywhere else.

When you have the Money:

1.Go to an afternoon movie. The earlier the showtime the better.

2.Enjoy the first movie.

3.When the movie ends, stay in the theatre and walk the aisles until you find the super sized fountain cup, and extra large pop corn…both of these are refillable. (Some people like to rinse out the cups, some don’t, the choice is yours. You should be fine by using your own straw.)

4. Continue watching movies all through the day and on to the night, eating only popcorn and soft drinks until you are a strung out pathetic loser.

Repeat these steps every Sunday, telling all your friends how smart you are cause you have figured out a way to scam yourself a routine that will rival online video games and chronic masturbation any day.

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