Restraining Order FAQ’s

A restraining order can be hard to understand and complicated to follow. Here is a list of Frequently Asked Questions to help guide you through this difficult time.

Can I watch my ex girlfriend with binoculars or a telescope without breaking the law?
Yes. Most orders require that you stay 100 meters away from the person, but they do not stipulate that you can’t stake out her house or workplace from distances greater than what is prescribed on the order.

My ex girlfriend is being a cock tease. Am I allowed to come within 100 meters to investigate?
No. Girls can do lots of crazy things to lead a guy on, like answering phone calls or asking you to respect her privacy. This does not mean you can break the order. Stay Back.

I’m thinking of sending her another dick pic. Does this constitute a violation?
No. Dicks are not easy to identify like a finger print or DNA sample. As long as you send it from a private number dick pics are dismissible evidence in court.

My ex has an order against me but her new boyfriend does not. Can I beat him up?
Yes. The order protects her only. If you get him to agree to a fight you are clear to assault him at your discretion.

I miss my baby and want to bump into her. Can I do this?
Yes. Chance meetings are permissible, but they must be in a public place.  Try catching her in an elevator or some other type of enclosure. Women’s washrooms are off limits.

I’ve just been caught with my ex’s panties. Can I get jail time for this?
Short answer is no. You are guilty of possession of stolen property, but you are not guilty of breaking the order. The police have no way of proving you entered her residents. However if she provides the court with surveillance footage, you can be spending up to 30 days behind bars.

I have four restraining orders against me. Is this even legal?
Hey Phil. Jesus Christ man, you gotta take it easy. Give me a call sometime and I can explain all this in better detail.

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